16 days... and counting

Oh my GAWD! I have now officially recaptured that long lost eagerness of being 11 years old. The eagerness associated with Christmas just being around the corner. Or, your birthday. Or, the last day of 6th grade.
Only - I have no f*cking clue when "that" day is. The possibility that it may be earlier... is not a good thing with me. I'll end up banking on it. I'm already rounding up the date for when I'm due & beginning to believe its sooner than it really is. I'm not exactly known and loved for my patience.
This past work week has been... difficult. And, I KNOW its only going to get more difficult with each passing day. And, it has.
I move slower each day - the movements from standing to sitting and back down again cause aches and pains. The process of switching positions is one that is both laborious and streneous. Once I'm up - I'm up. Same goes for when I'm down. And at the end of the day, I'm just wanting to be down. Now, I do still have my bouts of frantic ridiculousness (like suddenly having to pack for the hospital last night at midnight when I had to get up early this mroning). But mostly, I'm slipping more and more into a pattern of naps and lounging around. Things wear me out faster than ever.
I'm also becoming increasingly more scattered. I can have a conversation and not at all be listening. Or, worse, I get bored and space out only to jump to an entirely different (and completely unrelated) topic. And generally, that topic's already been explored but I wasn't at all listening the first time around. Its amazing that pregnant women have any friends when all is said and done. I'd kill me if I had to talk to myself... it must be exhausting.
I also no longer care... about anything I used to care about. I am beginning to wear the same thing 3 days in a row - I don't care what people say or think. Frankly, the number of outfits that appropriately cover my expanding mid-section are decreasing at a rate I find impossible to keep up with. I'm getting limited in my selection through sheer force of growing nature. When the bottom of your stretched, pasty belly hangs out and you catch a glimpse in the office bathroom mirror... you realize repeats are a better alternative to variety of cute tops that, at one time, fit properly.
I also don't care if I let work projects slide (thankfully, no one at work has caught on to this.. and if they have, they've been very sweet about letting it go). The house is growing increasingly more cluttered... again, no care. I now want to leave places/events to go home and be left alone (even Rob said he's begun to feel like he's slipping into hibernation lately), again, don't care. I'm pretty laid back when it comes to the things I found very important just a few months ago. Looking great, keeping organized and making appearances are all very low on my priority scale.
Nesting. I think I'm nesting more and more each day. And my form of it - is hoarding. Stock-piling. Preparing for what will be... the baby apocolypse. I recently HAD to have absorbing goods in mass quantities (pads of every variety - see earlier posts). Now I have begun stocking up on soap - bar soap, shampoo, laundry... you just never know when we may need to suddenly wash things and find ourselves low on soap. Rob's been very patient and kind of this process (last night it was batteries - get some for the flashlights, some extras for the camera... what the hell is next). He's fine as long as I keep buying things we will actually use. If I suddenly start stocking up on say, lime jello, he may just go ahead and leave me at the hospital waiting room with no car. But as it is now, my craziness has only assured him that he will not be asked to make a midnight dash for soap after the baby is here. If I want jello at 3AM when breast-feeding baby - I may be out of luck...
Nesting and baby laundry... phew! This is a wierd one. You have to wash EVERYTHING and take it all out of its packages. Its wierd preparing a room for someone who isn't here and you've never met. Do we have enough sheets? Will this sheet saver work and should I buy an extra in case? How many receiving blankets do I really need - maybe I'll leave this in the package. Rob and I have progessively moved more and more toward prepping the mass amounts of laundry that will need to be washed for the coming weeks. We cut all clothing tags a few weeks back (for some reason that was a major commitment, like, we could still back out of having a kid... a girl... and return many of these items. With no receipts, you really can't!). 2 days ago I opened up all the towels, sheets and many blankets in preparation for the great wash. Hell if I'll ever find what I need when I need it - this kid has more cotton products that I do.
Crampy. My last thing worth mentioning is the ever increasingly "blah" sensation that hits everyone in the end. Along with the aches, the tired, the "not caring"... you also become crampy. Obviously, this is nature's way of building up to full-blown active labor. But it sucks wondering if what I feel is "it" or leading up to "it". It sucks thinking I have cramps for an hour or two only for them to go away for another morning. It sucks thinking I may be experiencing this everyday for the next 2 weeks (and then some) before they actually organize into something progressive. I see more and more why pregnant woman just sit on the couch with their feet up in these final days.
I had a conversation with T last night (her baby is now officially 10 weeks old + 1 day) regarding the horribleness that is the final 2 weeks of pregnancy. I described my awkward flipping in bed and night and the midnight pees. I mentioned the aches and the air-headedness I've adapted recently. Sadly, she did recall it but also seemed like some of it was already slipping her mind (am I right, T?). I'm beginning to notice a just a hint of the "you forget it all in the end" that has begun to settle with her. Frankly, how can you remember all these details and nuances after actually having a baby complete with a NEW set of nuances and details to learn/explore. I think its funny that only a few short months from now - I, too, may have forgotton all these little things which seem to dominate my mind everyday. Maybe its good that I've kept a running log of all of this. Maybe others will gain comfort and knowledge in knowing what I experienced along the way (cause I'll have forgotten when you ask me). Maybe all these things are supposed to be forgotten in order to create a sibling years from now and if I remebered all these details - it would never happen. I guess I'll find out, right?