*** Blood bath...

Everything seems fine when I got up this morning at 7AM. Tom & Jerry, cereal & bagels, shower and make-up.
Rob leaves for his trip... gulp.
A half hour later I pee and look down to see a rather "full" toilet. Its all speckly and sitting in the bottom and its not all that different from a period. *sigh*. 'This can't be good,' I say to myself as I clean-up and again raid the linen closet for a maxi pad.
I send a photo to Rob. Gross? Maybe.
A sign of not wanting to endure this alone? Definitely.

I call my dad and tell him to not hold his breath, it doesn't look good (to me) and I have yet to hear from the doctor.

My boobs are still swollen like I'm pregnant. I read about this online - it can take awhile for pregnancy symptoms to fade. I also read that by still having symptoms that this could be good because the bleeding is just a threatened abortion/decidual bleeding.

Egads, I just want to know so I can move on... either direction this fork of the road goes will be fine... just pick a fork already!

**Update**
I call the doctor and leave a mesage with his nurses at 2PM. I basically tell them to tell the doctor, "I've been bleeding thick, red blood (much like the very first day of a period) everytime I go pee. Go ahead and tell him not to worry about breaking any bad news to me when he does call. I can take it. I'm not feeling very good about this."
An hour later, 3PM, the phone rings.
"What's going on?" he asks.
I provide details... he really says nothing aside from introspective grunts that convey neither positive or negative opinions.
I really do like my doctor. I don't take this any way other then being scientific...
"How was the blood test results?" I ask assuming the worst.
"Well, your HgG levels were good (his voice goes up into a positive upswing. This must be good, then!). They were 1400 (I can't remember the specific 1400+ number). That's a good level that we'd like to see at about your timeline for being pregnant.
The progesterone levels... you'll remember I said we would like to see them at about 15? Well, they were a 7."
I deflate assuming this means I happened to go in for bloodwork at the precise moment this pregnancy stopped thus freeze-framing my numbers as both high and starting to downfall...
He quickly finishes during my silence, "But that's doesn't really tell me what could be going on. We will need to test again and wait & see what happens before we can tell if this is on its way up or on its way down. I've seen people go on to carry healthy pregnancies with a progesterone of 1!"
I babble something here about what should I do next.
"I'd like to see you again in a week. That way we can compare and see what's happening."
Me, "Bloodwork or sonogram?"
Doctor, "We'll do another sonogram and see if we can measure any changes or see any movement. Now, if you continue to have the bleeding and it developments into cramping.... if you pass the pregnancy, then we'll have our answer. Otherwise, we'll just have to wait and see."
Great. So I quickly scribble down notes on my mental chalkboard:
1. You miscarry over the weekend and pass a huge blood clot thus, giving you your final answer.
2. You experience no hard cramping, get to next week and find a non-moving & unchanged in size baby thus, giving you your final answer.
3. You experience no hard cramping, get to next week and find a slightly more developed & larger baby thus, giving you your final answer.

So, at the end of the call, the doctor concludes that I can call him anytime over the weekend since he is on call. I feel very relieved knowing this and I begin to brace for what will feel like a very long wait to see how my 50/50 odds will fall...